Aha moment!

                So today I am reading a book, "The marriage of your dreams by Rick Johnson" and I was getting frustrated because I was still at the beginning so I decided to skip a few chapters. And then I come across the chapter on respect and appreciation, which is where I decide to read from. I know for some people this seems to appear a basic foundational aspect. However for me its an aspect I greatly need to work at. I'm not perfect and quite often I stumble. In our last argument I heard that I did not show respect nor was I appreciative and for me that was baffling because I appreciate everything my husband does. Furthermore I have a high level of respect for him because he made me a promise & commitment and he has kept that promise & commitment to this day.

          Now that I'm reading this chapter, I realize that while I thought I had been expressing respect and appreciation, I had not. I had just been giving lip-service. Saying one thing while my actions and behavior said something else. I would say babe I respect you but then not give him my undivided attention. I'd say babe I appreciate you but then complain about frivolous things. And while my words said the right things, my behavior said the opposite. 

           I realize I need to work on making my behavior match my words. If I say I love you, my actions need to repeat I love you. If I want to communicate I respect you, my actions need to back it up. If I appreciate you my body language and other communication need to reflect my appreciation.

       So here are a few of the tips I wrote down {mind you I wrote a lot down, I'll only share a portion}:

• I can respect Chris (my hubby) by trusting his judgment and supporting his decisions.
• Don't criticize him, make fun of him (even with good intentions), or try to "jump the gun" on anything he is responsible for, it is a sign of disrespect and is humiliating.
• Respect is GIVEN not earned. Just like love is given not earned.
• Put hubby first before the children, it reminds him of how important he is.
• Build him up in public, it makes him feel good and makes others look at him positively.
• Make him feel good knowing you are happy and content by NOT grumbling or complaining.

             I'm learning that even though I mean no harm by some of the things I say or do, it does in fact cause harm. I have also learned that while I may just be observing things that I would like to have, when I voice my observations it comes off as me being unsatisfied with what I already have and unappreciative of what I have. It does NOT matter how I meant what I said but how it CAME OFF to him because once the words are out they cannot be taken back. So now I am truly realizing how I need to really think before I speak and really consider how what I say may affect my husband.

       Once again I know that this may seem novice to some people, this is in fact a breath of fresh air to me. I'm still learning as I've only been married 2 & a half years and was courted by my husband for only two weeks before we got married.

       I can say that I will continue to learn because I know that people change, expectations change but my love and dedication will NOT.

       I want to encourage ALL of you to do the same. Wives take the time to learn your husband, its OK to read a few books to get a generalized idea on how to love, respect, and appreciate your husband then tailor those ideas to your husband. In your marriage, in your family, nothing is more important than God and your husband. And how your treat your husband is important to God too.

Eph. 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

Eph 5:22-24 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. ²³ For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. ²⁴ Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

These two verses remind me of my role in my marriage. I need to submit to my husband (when I looked up submission in a thesaurus I saw respect, honor and obedience) and I need to build him up.

In this day and age submission seems like a dirty word, something to avoid. However in reality submission can be something beautiful and can blossom a marriage. There are different but equal roles in being a husband and wife. No role is more important than the other and both are interdependent. What matters is that both commit to their role in the marriage understanding the husband is the head of the wife and Christ is the head of the husband. When we have this view of marriage when have the grander picture. When we submit to our husbands we are in turn submitting to Christ {especially when we have a godly husband}.

~Love to you all

Kris Bush

My hubby and I about a month or so ago :)

Thanksgiving and family

        Whew! So Thanksgiving has past. Sorry I have not blogged during that time. My mom and future step dad came to visit from Chicago and we hadn't seen them in 5 months (well 9 months for my husband since he had to work while I was in Chicago back in June). One thing I can say is that I am thankful for my family. My husband, my children, my mom and her fiancee. I am so thankful for each of them and what each of them adds to my life.

        One thing I have realized during this last week is that family is so important, it doesn't matter where you are as long as you're together you will have a good time and create new memories.

        I also realized that my husband truly is my best friend and truly does have my back. Like many couples we have those  rough days. We are NOT perfect nor exempt from marital woes. However I realize that it has not been us keeping our marriage together but GOD. He has always made us see the big picture and to realize that what we do does not just affect us but it directly affects our children.

      Let me be completely honest with you all.... I am not the perfect wife. I am not always the quiet spirited submissive wife that I should be. I do try to be the best wife and mother that I can be. Do I stumble at times? Yes. I am not always at my best. There are times when I am down right rude and irritable. There are other times when I am frustrated and in need of some quiet mommy time, devoid of children. So don't read my blog and assume that I always get it right because I don't. There are times when my marriage itself gets questioned (and those are the times that God just shows up and shows out reminding us of why He brought us together). In Christ, in my walk with Him, I am not always 100% faithful, am I trying though? Yes. There are times when I am in need of encouragement because I know our calling and I am wondering when are we going to get there. 

   I'll stop here because I could go on and on, literally. Instead of complaining or getting upset I have to remember to pray and let God work on the things that I cannot not do anything about. I just wanted to share a little bit more of me with you so that you all can have a more transparent view of who I am. I write well and most times I know better. But as I am sure you know, there's a difference between knowing better and always doing better.

~Love to you all

Kris Bush

  

This is my family, my husband and our two children. This is my mirror they show me who I really am. I am so thankful for them, my loves.

 

This is me with our youngest when he was about 4 months old. {My first time meeting my mother-in-law and grandmother-in-law in person}

New Devotional

Hi Everyone!!! Moms..Dads...this post is for you!

           We all want our children to know God and to grow and develop a relationship with Him. I know we do. So on NetGalley, I saw the Action Bible Devotional for Kids and decided to request it. Great decision. So far my daughter loves it! She looks forward to each day's reading and answering the questions as well as the after activities it provides.

           I want to encourage all of my readers to please encourage your child(ren), nieces, nephews, cousins to start reading the bible early. Instill in them the want and need of knowing God early. Teach them who God is early so that they won't have so learn later in life after they've bumped their heads. Teach them NOW so that they will know that nothing they could ever do in life would separate them from the Lord. Teach them who Jesus really is. Don't leave your child's knowledge and future salvation up to whoever teaches them in Sunday school or leave it to chance because you think they're "too young" to learn. They will never be too young and it will never be too early.

         The Action Bible Devotional has colorful pictures that depict what goes on in the bible it tells the story and even has the key memory verse for each story. Then there are questions, activities, and some have a blank page for the kids to write or draw in what they learned. It keeps them engaged and wanting to learn the bible, which is what we, as parents, want.

Right now I see the bible at Wal-Mart for $15 which is a decent price.

http://www.walmart.com/ip/19533017



~ I hope you all have a great day.
Love to you all
Kris Bush

     

The 5 LOVE Languages of Children...what's yours??

            For the most part, if you know me or read this blog you know I am married with two children. And we take our jobs as parents very serious. We know that its up to us to raise productive members of society. So recently I signed up to be a reviewer for MP (Moody Publisher). One of the books on their list of books to review was 'The 5 Love Languages for Children.' 

            This book is literally HANDS DOWN the best book in regards to parenting, outside of the bible, that I have ever read. This book is authored by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell, both have written books to help marriage (Chapman) and families (Campbell). 

           The 5 love languages are physical touch, quality time, acts of service, gifts, and words of affirmation. In reading this book I believe I have discovered my husband, my daughter, and my love language (our son is too young to really exhibit one yet). My daughter is a combo of quality time and physical touch. My husband is a combo of acts of service and physical touch. I am a combo of words of affirmation and quality time. And as you can see we all for the most part speak different love languages, which makes for loads of confusion.

          In reading this book I feel like I've learned something tremendous on how to effectively communicate love to my family. My daughter likes to be in the same room as everyone else. My husband likes to be touched. And I love to verbally know you love me. Of course I knew these things however it didn't quite click until I read this book. So now I am intentionally trying to communicate love to my family. OMGoodness, I don't think you all understand the wealth of knowledge in this book. I personally encourage you to read this book, especially if you have children (no it does not matter how old they are! Regardless to age, they need to be loved). If you don't have children but plan on having them, read the book anyways. If you are just focused on your marriage, guess what they have one just for couples, go read that one. I have the 5 love languages for couples devotional, so yes from experience I can tell you the book is worth every dollar and worth reading. Your marriage will benefit from it. 

~Happy Reading...Happy Holidays. 
Everyday be thankful and express it. It's one thing to be thankful its a whole nother thing to express it. The same with love. People don't just assume you love them, you have to express your love for them to them.

Love to you ALL...
Kris Bush

For the ladies

          When I was single I wanted a certain life. I wanted a family. I wanted a husband who would love me, nourishing and cherishing me. I wanted a leader, someone who wouldn't allow me to run him. Yes, I really wanted that because I know marriage is for life and I need a challenge.
          But even more so I was a mess. I didn't start getting my life together until literally a month or so before I got married. It had nothing to do with my husband and everything to do with me and what I wanted. Heck, I didn't even know my husband beyond speaking in public {you know, hi and bye} until 2 1/2 weeks before we got married!
         
          So I want to encourage a lot of young women who still out there dating. First off, get to know God and get in touch with yourself. How can you know what you want if you don't know Him who created you? Every time I'm on Facebook I read about a some dude who's done some girl wrong and now she's angry. And I want to ask her what did you expect? If he wasn't looking to be married and making himself ready to be a husband, guess what? She was his temporary play thing...apart of sowing his wild oats and unnecessary soul ties.

          This is something young women need to understand. Ask a young man what is it he wants from you. Where is the relationship going? The answers to these questions will help you know what your next move will be. If he can't tell you where he's leading you then trust and believe he's leading you into sin and you will be his temporary fix until he desires something else. A man who knows what he wants has no qualms about answering these questions. He understands that as the man in the relationship he sets the tone and its his job to lead. A man of God will lead you to God. And will not hesitate to tell you if he's ready for a relationship or not.

        Young women do not base your happiness on situations and circumstances. "Oh I'll just be happy if I could have a successful relationship." FAIL. You be joyful because you have GOD and because He prevails over any and all things. You be happy because of your relationship with God. If you don't have a relationship with God I suggest you get one. Not trying to sound cliche' but until you have that foundational relationship with God there will always be some void, some hole in your life you will be trying to fulfill.

        Focus on God. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33) Put your time and energy into God and let the background details of your life be fulfilled by Him. Allow Him to lead you in any and all situations.

Love to you.
~Kris Bush

Election night....aftermath

           In the wake of the reelection of President Obama, I go on Twitter and see the ugliness that has reared its its ugly head among supporters of President Obama and Mitt Romney.

           The first thing I notice, well at least on my timeline is the ugliness that is being spewed from self proclaimed Christians. They're angry because (1) Romney lost and (2) they believe Obama stands for abortion and gay marriage.

           The second thing I think about is that, if you are a self proclaimed Christian who are you to judge anyone or put anyone down for their beliefs, regardless to how different they are from yours?

           Last night I watched and read. And I noticed people had two main complaints that Obama's Administration was not against gay marriage and advocated women's rights which includes the right to have an abortion. Then I posed this question: Is the prohibition of gay marriage and abortion all that matters in choosing a president?

           I think not. I think it's more than that. And even more than that, what about LOVE. How can you dismiss love? I read God's Word and I see something that stands out to me, God wants our hearts. He wants us to be obedient because we love Him not because it is "the law." He has said himself obedience is more important than sacrifice. In other words you can outwardly do the "right" things but if your heart does not reflect it then it is does not matter! 

            People say prohibit gay marriage and abortion. I say let people be! There are hordes of people who do not believe in God, who do not know Him. So no we cannot insist our belief on an entire nation. We are not Old Testament Israel in which that would have been acceptable. When you love, you do NOT insist on your own way but look out for the interest of the next person. ALL of this can be so SIMPLE: if you do not condone gay marriage, don't turn gay and get married; you don't condone abortion don't have one! Simple other than that, say your PEACE and shake the dust from your feet.


My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways. (Proverbs 23:26)

If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, shake the dust off your feet when you leave that home or town. (Matthew 10:14)

 Last night I made it clear: 

Christ himself is a gentleman, meaning He won't force Himself on anyone. You and me included. He will however love us in spite of. Matthew 10:14 makes this very clear. Jesus told them speak the gospel (not force the gospel) and if they do not welcome it, shake the dust off your feet and keep it moving!

Yes I love the Lord. And I want everyone's love and obedience to Him to be voluntary! Not just doing it because it's the law! How much more richer our obedience to the Lord when its done out of love and sheer reverence for Him? Not because we were badgered by other Christians. Not because we are forced to by law but because we WANT to. It's makes all the difference

Please remember this, remember the above scriptures next time you think about insisting on Christ. No speak of Christ's love and demonstrate His love. Demonstrate how wonderful He is your behavior. We are earthly representations of HIM. Represent Him well. Don't make Him out to be a bully because you cannot control your feelings!

I want you all to come to know God and love Him like do. Actually I want you to know Him better than I do because even I have slip ups. I just thank God for grace and mercy to carry me through and the courage stand up and keep it moving.

Love to you all
Kris Bush

Friday FREEBIES

Good morning everyone!!!

This morning I received an e-mail from Paper Coterie with a new promo code in it for.... DAILY GRATITUDE journals!

The promo code is DAILYGRATITUDE and you receive 50% off when you purchase one!

Oh yeah Nordstorms is giving away free perfume samples  this weekend. It started yesterday, I just found out the last day is Sunday.

Papa John's giving away free pizza!! {follow the link} http://www.papajohns.com/snf/?utm_source=74682&utm_medium=PartnerFB&utm_campaign=201274682

Free Family Photos at JC Penny's this November. They include free sitting fees, free 8x10 and free digital copies via email. {follow the link} 

http://ebm.jcpenneyem.com/c/tag/hBQbu6MAJy2U8B8ub02ApRtUXjj/doc.htm

Free complimentary subscription to Ebony Magazine! I did sign up for one, LOL. {Follow the link} https://www.valuemags.com/freeoffer/freeoffer.asp?offer=Ebony_StartSamp

Enjoy!!

Kris Bush

(I have reduced the price of my book on Amazon to 2.99, the lowest Amazon will allow me to set the price at. Check it out!!)

Thursday Link up!!!

Every Thursday come add your blog or website for others to link up with you! We can all support each other!

Here are a couple of blogs/websites I absolutely love visiting. I always find a great read, free printables, and a wealth of information to help with homemaking and home-schooling!

Flourish - | Living an Abundant & Satisfying Life | Spiritual Growth | Homeschooling | Fit Life

Family, Motherhood & Homeschool Articles | Holy Spirit-led Homeschooling | Living the Life of Faith

Time-Warp Wife - Empowering Wives to Joyfully Serve

Love to you
Kris Bush

If you want to add your blog/website click the link below and I'll add them to the post!!