Thursday, January 14, 2010


I'm watching the news channels and my heart is so heavy. Once again a natural disaster is killing our people. (And I don't mean people as in race, as in people in general) It hurts so bad to watch because I am here in Chicago without much to help. I pray and I hope God hears the prayers & feels the tears & touch upon people's hearts who have it to give. Who can go over there and help with damage control.

It feels like we're going through this again. Didn't we just go through this with Hurricane Katrina? Didn't we see so many people die & get stranded?

My main question is…why weren't those people evacuated??! I know someone had to detect something before it happened. And why is relief just getting there today? People have private jets & planes & helicopters!

Have you done your part? Even if it's just a prayer or $5, it doesn't matter as long as you do something.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Love thy self

Don't you just love the person that you are? If you do..........Congrats on your self-love. I encourage those who do not completely & truly love themselves, to look in the mirror. Look at how intricately beautiful you are! Look at how God made you a one of a kind master creation. Even Identical twins have something that makes him or her different. Every person has their flaws. I say learn to love your flaws because the person who truly & unconditionally loves you does not pay your flaws any attention. So why should you.

I understand that there are some people who have body issues. I am one of them. Most people, who know me, would never believe that I have my insecurities as well. I am skinny. I always have been, I can show pictures from any age & I will be skinny in the picture. My issue with myself is my skinniness I hate being so thin & I love being so thin. I like being thin because I have less health risks (high blood pressure, diabetes, and heart disease) yet I hate being thin because as a black woman there is this stereotype that you have to be "thick" with a "big butt." While there are many of us who are not "thick" nor do we have a "big butt." I am one of those black women who are thin with a shape. And it has taken my entire life to become comfortable with my body.

The main difference between skinny girls & obese women is that at least obese women can generally change their body. They can have gastric bypass surgery or get the lap band, they can diet and exercise and that have the body that they desire. Skinny women do not have the option of dieting & exercise to gain weight. I am about 5'9 and at this height to me, I do not feel comfortable being under 135 lbs, because once I fall under 135 lbs I start to look anorexic as if there's something wrong with me. I like the weight I am at now, about 145 lbs. I feel comfortable in anything that I wear. For someone overweight it probably sounds crazy that skinny women also have body image issues but we do.

I have this one friend who's a big girl and always got a skinny girl joke. After a while I had to tell her to STOP with the jokes. I pointed out that the skinny jokes aren't funny, how would she like it if I kept cracking fat girl jokes. People don't understand that skinny girls do not like people poking fun at us just like fat/obese/big girls don't.


I am currently coming to terms with my weight and the fact that I am probably meant to be thin. And that's fine I can accept being thin.

Monday, January 4, 2010


This past weekend I found myself feeling so alone as if there was something missing from my life. And I had to get down on my KNEES and pray. I needed God to intervene and make His presence so well known that I'd never feel alone and I'd never feel empty again. Now here it is 2 days later and I feel so ALIVE. I love the way God answered my prayer. He made his presence known as well as fulfilled me. I have this insatiable urge to read my bible and get closer to his Word. I enjoy my gospel music more now than I ever have. I haven't listened to anything but gospel music since then.

I wanted to share my story with others so that they can know that God is so real. And that anyone can accept Him. You just have to believe and receive. You have to give your heart to Him. You have to be willing to let Him come in and take over. You have to open your heart, your mind, and your soul to God's presence. I prayed this hardest and most purely than I have ever prayed in my life. I asked God to come into my life and guide me so that I am in order with His will. I asked God to mold me into the person He wants me to be. I told God I didn't want to be the person I had been. I want to be a better person with a more compassionate, patient, & understanding heart. I asked God for patience and wisdom.

"And now said the Lord that formed me from the womb to be his servant, to bring Jacob again to him; though Israel be not gathered, yet shall I be glorious in the eyes of the Lord and my God shall be my strength." Isaiah 49:5

"They are created now and not from the beginning, even before the day when thou heard them not let thou should say, Behold I knew them." Isaiah 48:7

Friday, January 1, 2010


Being healthy is so important. Taking care of the body that GOD gave you is so important. We only receive one body in this lifetime so we must take care of that body so that we may enjoy life abundantly. Health is so important because if you aren't mentally healthy how can you be physically healthy or emotionally healthy? I say this because when you are depressed (mentally unhealthy) you start suffering physical ailments (clinically proven). When you are emotionally unhealthy you don't particularly take out the necessary time to make sure you are physically healthy.

You have to be healthy. You have to take care of yourself. If that means exercising on an everyday basis then so be it. Turn your exercise into something you enjoy. Dancing is an all over exercise. Skating is an all over exercise. Yoga is a physical & mental exercise. Riding a bicycle is great exercise. The main point to understand is that exercise doesn't have to be disappointing.

Being healthy is more than just for yourself, it's also for your family & friends. Being healthy will allow you to literally enjoy life. Just think if you're always out of breath & tired, how can you enjoy what life has to offer? If you have kids, don't you want to play with your kids? People always want to go on vacation; wouldn't you like to go as well?

Being healthy can also be a state of mind. Meaning that to be physically healthy you have to believe it as well as doing the actual exercise. Even with emotional health you have to believe in your happiness & actually feel your happiness.

As you are starting your New Year remember that your health should be in your top priorities. Do you expect God to live in toxic waste? No? Then why should you?

And to make your exercising more fun & meaningful, enlist the help of your friends & family. Have someone exercise with you. Have someone call, text, and email you to keep you motivated. With your mental & emotional healthy do the SAME thing. Make your friends & family aware of what's going on with you & ask them to help keep you motivated.

My family likes to do what we call, "our secret parties." We get together to enjoy each other's company, we catch up on each other's lives. We share our experiences & help each other with any problems. We cry together & celebrate together. We are cousins & friends. We are our own support group. I'd like to share that with anyone who needs it. If you need a warm loving support group, we can start one. Even if we need to telecommunicate, that's fine. That's the whole purpose of this blog is to help any way that I can.

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